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Dr. Seuss’ The Cat in the Hat (condensed)

by Mia Descandion

ANNOYING CAT RUINS HOUSE, CHILDREN

To say that I absolutely hate this movie with an undying passion is untrue. To say instead that I want the person who greenlighted, produced, directed, and wrote this severely beaten until their urine drips with blood is more correct.

(not a fan of the movie)

Feb   March 2004   Apr
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Cat: Hello, I am invading your house with hilarity.
Boy: How did you get in here you fruity feline?
Cat: This titilating image of your mom is giving me a hat erection.
Girl: God, why are you even here, Cat?
Cat: Now that I have ruined your house I will leave.
Boy: I am going to kill you, Cat.